Sunday, October 14, 2012

When Did My Life Turn Into A Jerry Springer Episode?

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So today my life could have been featured on a Jerry Springer episode!  Why does it have to be life that!?!  I have ENOUGH to deal with!  It all started innocently enough.  I found a listing for a condo in Scottsdale. I called last night and asked the realtor to show me the property today.  She said ok and I asked HER for a time.  She said 9:30am.  I said ok and I asked Bailey if she wanted to go with us.  I was  not intending for her to babysit for me at all today.  Maybe help keep the kids in line for a bit while we looked at the condo but that is all.
We arrive on time.  We all get out and look around.  It is nice.  Very bland and boring because everything looks the same but it is quiet and appears very safe.  I know the schools in the area are good too.  We stayed around and I never saw the realtor we were suppose to be meeting.  I call her phone three times in thirty minutes.  No answer!  So we left and I called the property management company telling them I wanted SOMEONE to show me the property.  I head out and go to the McDonald's on North Scottsdale and Thomas.  We get there and the kids know there is a playland here so they want to go inside.  At the same time I pulled up the realtor called me back saying her ringer was off and she missed my calls.  She said she was inside the condo!  Are you friggin' kidding me?  I said I would head back after I get everyone settled down.  

Bailey and I took the children inside and I got some food for them.  I headed back to the condo leaving Bailey and the children at McDonald's.  I should NOT have done that!  I went back and saw the condo.  It would suit our needs but there are some things about it that does not make it ideal for us.  I am torn on what I should do.  In the meantime, while I am gone, is where all the action is...

When I arrive Bailey tells me the whole story of what happened while I was away.  About 10 minutes after I left the children started to get rowdy.  James was running around like a wild boy and was up in the playland equipment poking people in the eye.  Why he was doing this I have NO idea!  Bailey told him to stop and he ignored her so she got him and forced him to sit in time out.  While sitting in timeout he was getting loud and crying.  She was trying to get him to settle down and when she was about to let him go he poked Margaret in the eye!  So she took James' hand and spanked it.  Now picture it....Margaret is wailing, James is crying and saying Bailey slapped him and she was going to get a spanking from me while Joseph sat in his stroller.  With all the commotion the shift manager came over and asked her and the children to leave the playland area.  Bailey said that was fine.  She got up and moved her and the children into the restaurant area.
Now Bailey was sitting in the restaurant area with both James and Margaret on a backpack leash and Joseph in the stroller.  I am SO lost and I am telling Bailey I am trying to find my way back.  James and Margaret are crying.  They want to go back into the playland but now they are not allowed so they start screaming and crying.  James is pulling on his backpack leash and she does what I told her to do.  When he pulls like that I pull back and make him land on his butt.  He is screaming and crying. The shift manager approaches Bailey again and tells her she has called the police.  Bailey said that is fine and she was going to sit there until the police arrived.  I am still trying to find my way back.  The police come and Bailey explains what happened.  That James is a FOUR YEAR OLD CHILD and was misbehaving by poking people in the eye, she tried to correct his behavior but that only made things worse, then the manager kicked them out of the playland, that made everything worse and she said she was waiting for me to return.  She explained that the children were autistic and did not always listen to instructions.  The policeman said he understood.  He had a niece that was autistic.  So after that Bailey went outside with the children and waited for me to arrive. OMG!!!  What a CRAZY situation!  I don't think the manager even warned Bailey she was going to call the police!

I was SO freaking lost!  The GPS on my phone kept sending me to the wrong places. I had to get the cross streets from Bailey and google the address to get the right McDonalds.   I apologized over and over again to her.  Not only for the way the children behaved and me being late but that I had NEVER intended to be gone for SO long!  I bought her lunch to help make up for me being so late and I talked to her about what a great job I thought she did handling the situation she was in.  I have to admit she kept a cool head in the situation!

Tomorrow I start my job.  I am excited to go back to work, scared and worried for the children.  John send me a message on Facebook and I replied.  You can read what I said...


I just wanted to tell you good luck tomorrow. I know you have been waiting for this moment for a long time. I have been praying every day for you. I know it will be tough to be away from the children, but it will also be good to get out there are do something you have been planning for and educating yourself for. I will be thinking about you tomorrow and trying to send you good vibes. I assume you found a babysitter. I hope she works out well and you like her. I know she will love the kids...everyone does.

Does the hotel have a phone number I can call? I'd still like to call the kids after school tomorrow, and I know you will have your phone.

I will talk to you soon.


Here is my reply...


I have NOT been waiting for this moment for a long time. I had this moment FORCED upon me when you decided to leave us without sufficient means of support in July. I have been planning our move since I have been offered the job. In six weeks time, with very little help from you, I have had to pack, move and try not to be homeless.

You KNOW I have no desire for this job. Yes, it is what I went to school for and this position is perfect for me career-wise but YOU KNOW I did not want to work until next year. That the children, in particular Joseph, still need me. It is not a matter of just "being tough being away from the children" but they need me to take care of all their emotional, medical and school needs. It has been very tough for our autistic children to make the transition and the stress and lack of routine has all ready begun to show in behavioral issues. I see it as SOLELY YOUR responsibility for the emotional and behavioral problems you have caused the children by having me leave them.

Don't wish me luck or send me good vibes. You have not been a part of this in ANY way except CAUSING all of this to happen! You have done the bare minimum for me and the children. As you said you ASSUME I got a babysitter. You have NO idea what I had to do , who I got to watch the children and how it was done. I have found someone adequate but she will not be able to serve long-term because she cannot drive. So she cannot care for the children after we get out of the hotel. She cannot take the kids to any doctor,therapy or school appointments. I have to continue my search for a sitter. Even paying someone ALL of the child support you send apparently is not enough to hire a quality sitter so I am not sure what I am going to do since I need my income to pay rent, food and other bills.

As for calling the hotel you can try but the room phone is unplugged because the children will not leave it alone and had randomly called a few people in the hotel. I suggest you call in the evening at 8:00pm. Then they will get a chance to speak with you before bed.

Nothing like the parents verbally fighting.  Sigh!  He seems to have NO idea how much I resent him at the moment for making me leave the children.

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