Showing posts with label men who do not live up to their responsibilities. Show all posts
Showing posts with label men who do not live up to their responsibilities. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Stories of a REAL man...Are there any around 40 or under?

It seems to be some sort of generational gap.  My friend Krissi and I were talking.  She was telling me how her father would have sacrificed EVERYTHING to take care of his children.  Then we both talked about our respective sperm donors. We discussed how her John was being a complete jerk and then we talked about my John.  He had recently changed the child support rules on me without bothering to tell me first.  He wound up shorting me about $250 that payment.  He changed the child support from the agreed upon $700 twice a month to about $500.  Nice of him to let me know he was going to do that when he KNEW I was trying to get the money to move out of the hotel and into a house.  Plus I needed ALL the child support money to pay the caregivers I was trying to keep/hire for the children so I could go to work.  When I confronted him about this he said I had TAKEN EVERYTHING.  Are you serious?  You have the nerve to say that to me?  I SOLD most of what WE had so I could have money because YOU left when I was NOT working.  What stuff was left I packed and took with me because YOU said YOU did not want it. As for money, I was only getting from you what I NEEDED so the children and I could survive and have food.  Even then it was not enough because I lost the house in Henderson.

Where are the MEN today?  When I moved into the house I let Bailey move in so she could watch the children and she asked if her grandfather could come too.  We were both a bit hesitant about the idea initially but when he said to me that it does not matter that he is uncomfortable it is ALL ABOUT THE CHILDREN!  In that one statement, I KNEW, we would be able to work things out.  On the first night in the house Bill (Bailey's grandfather) and I had a real chance to talk and it was refreshing.  He had already fixed a few things around the house without having to be asked.  He was planning to go grocery shopping for EVERYONE without having to be asked.  Bailey and I were talking about getting eyebrows and legs waxed.  He said would be willing to send BOTH of us to the spa after the 20th of the month.  He said it would not only be HIS treat BUT he was also willing to watch the children while we went out!  Then James and Margaret started to cry because they were in a new house and alone.  Bailey was about to get up to check on them but Bill said for her to sit down and he would go.  He went into their room and laid down in the floor until Joseph and Margaret were asleep and James was settled down.  That was SO nice!  Having a male figure in the house has been great for James and he LOVES being Grandpa's sidekick...LOL.

Today I went to work early in the morning.  When I got home I got a HUGE surprise!  Bailey and her grandfather had fixed several things around the house.  At least things that could be fixed!  They had gone to my bathroom in the house and put up a shower curtain they had and the bathroom rugs were in the floor too.  About 30 minutes after I got to the house Bill had the dinner ready HE had COOKED!  Yes, it was HIS DAY OFF and he worked in the house, outside the house (weeding part of the yard and checking the sprinkler system), AND cooked!  It was yummy!  I had pork chops, green beans, and mashed red potatoes.  It was great!  Once dinner was done I played with the kids as Bailey and her grandfather cleaned the kitchen and got the dishwasher started.  It was SO nice.  I got to lay in the floor (still no furniture in the house) and play with the children and get on the computer.

This is what it is like to have a MAN in the house.  It is SO refreshing!  A man who sees things that need to be done and just does them without being asked.  Someone who is happy to help and does not require constant stroking of the ego because they did something the SHOULD have done. He is willing to take care of others without asking anything in return.  Bill is not perfect.  He has his faults too but they are small in comparison to all the help he provides. It has been a long time since I had someone who was helping to take care of the family.  I had all most forgotten when it was like to have help!  You, Bill, I am sad to say are a dying breed I think.  I am not sure we we as women (or society) have gone wrong but I hope it gets better.  Bill is willing to sacrifice everything in order to provide for the children (including some who are not his own).  Who else but a WOMAN does that nowadays?

Where are the MEN who are 40 or under?  Are there any out there?  I think there might be a few and ladies if you have a MAN, hold on to him tight!  He is worth his weight in gold!!!